And Now.

I'm still alive.

As I head towards the Place,

I dread coming face to face with the likeness of Your being.

I'd have to plaster a smile and be coerced to acknowledge that presence should we cross paths. (It is not within me to ignore someone.)

Thereafter, as I pull away, the bravado within gives way and crumples in a heap.

Yet, I must pummel through this,

As I've done for the last 8 years.

Dear God,

Heal my pain.

Amen.