~ Twinkle Twinkle ~

* *Initial Design of the Destinee Necklace Eyed: similar to 1104DF (unable to locate the exact pic of the Destinee necklace online)
Purchased another necklace with larger diamonds eventually when Mum commented that the diamonds on the $2600 Destinee necklace were not conspicuous.

* *Earrings Purchased: 2450DB
Cool Factor: You can either use the earrings as shown in the picture or detach the parts for a pair of simple diamond studs.

**Bracelet Purchased: 0994DC
Initially, I'd wanted a thinner bracelet with tiny diamonds. Mum felt that it was a complete waste of money as the diamonds were barely visible. After much scrutiny, we settled on this bracelet with five individual diamonds that sit on the wrist when worn.

- You -

You are with me. You, who were there with me when I was teething. You, who were there to catch me when I fell. You, who brought a smile to my face. You, who brought tears to my eyes. Through the years, on the cobbled roads, You have changed. Many who had sought to take your place have constantly replaced You. You changed as the landscapes did. You taught me how to love, hate, hope, fear, guffaw and tear. You taught me lessons in life. You ventured into my world. You slipped from my feeble grasp..

My metamorphosis was sculpted in Your vision. You held me for a fleeting moment and traced transience with Your fingers. With You, there was a feline solitude reminiscent of splattered ardour. Carelessly, You slipped Your hand away from mine, brushing dismissively the ominous path.

You are a façade masked in reality. I’ve known You all my life, yet You are a detached stranger. Your presence is known but You’re distant. You are a companion but not a friend.

Who are You? I do not know.

You are the man in the street, the smiling aunt with a generous heart, the former paramour, the stranger on the train, the newfound acquaintance, the colleague in the concrete jungle, the deceased shrouded in the mortuary, the giggling schoolgirl.

You are everywhere. Each individual You has deposited a memory in my life.

Somewhere, somehow, I have met You.

Your indelible imprint do I cherish.

Maia's Poem

I suppose Maia had written this poem in the light of her crumbling relationship with Sly:

This black coat, brings back memories of you
I still remember you wearing it as you hug me tight
It's still hanging in my wardrobe, maybe you've forgotten
But I still remember your warmth deep inside my heart

The cigarette butts are still in the ashtray
It seems that you're there, and my tears are falling
If giving up needs courage, perhaps I've not enough determination
Or maybe everything happened too fast
That I hadn't even suspected a thing and I've already lost you

Blame it on me being blind.

Space

Sitting and staring at this blank space, I have nothing to write. Nothing new to speak about, nothing essential that would bring about any radical change. Troubled by several matters, shared with none. Inhibited by nothing but a silly shroud of pride. Resplendence twirling in mock temptation, there are queries to which no answers can be derived. Mindless pursuits of temporal bliss, eager to grasp & cling to a fragment of miraged hopes. A singular fragment would suffice. Flights of fancy pursued with abandoned guile, the severity of it all sinks in now. Self-admonishment transforms nothing. Space. I need a clean slate.

Mathematics by XXF

I shall spare you the nitty gritties of the ongoing XXF saga. Neither will I seek to scrutinize and conjure conspiracy theories. The voices of the public are invariably raging against the figures disclosed so far. Critically speaking, when these people expound their rage against you-know-who's salary & his privileges, I feel that the crux of the issue has been lost in this saga and that is, the patients and their future welfare.

The public ingests each figure revealed by the day and commits them to pure memory, revelling in subconscious delight while casually mentioning the numbers in their speeches with the Mr Tans & Mdm Lims. Why do these people actually wait with baited breath as each day unfolds a new revelation? Do they really care? Is there a genuine outrage at the funds being "channelled inappropriately" at the "public's expense" or is the root of the disgruntled masses tinged with envy? Envy at the fella travelling first-class. Envy at a six-figured annual salary. Envy at the fleet of luxury cars at his disposal. Envy. Envy. Envy.

Much has been said, discussed, scrutinized, dissected, evaluated, analysed, chopped and stirred in garlic. The media has had a field day shelling out reports to whet the public's appetite. Despite the extensive coverage over this saga, is the critical Voice being heard? The Voice of each individual patient and those in the line, as surmounting pressure accumulates daily, with the future of the divergence of funds dangling precariously, who listens to this Voice? Or has this singular collective Voice been drowned out by the cries of the masses? Overshadowed by the innocuous media fodder?

Interestingly, an article mentioned that despite rooting for the same cause, the XXF and the XX Foundation's garnering of funds had a multiple-fold difference. Therein lies the glitzy packaging of the XXF, appealing to the public's whims and fancies. Many have since halted their contributions to the XXF, claiming that they've been cheated. The salary scheme of the XXF and the numerous toilet fittings of contentment are not for me to comment on. What really drives these people to withdraw their financial chips is probably the indirect contribution to you-know-who's salary. It's not as if I'm deliriously plonking my cash to fuel his lifestyle. Consider this scenario: If every $0.52 of that single dollar you contribute goes to the patients, at least half of the money is utilised for the genunine cause. If you donate $0, the patients get absolutely nothing at all. It's simple mathematics. I'd rather contribute to someone's paycheck than cause the languishing of a sufferer.

Mode: Factory Worker

The day's Thursday. For another 35 minutes, that is. Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday gave me the slip rather easily.

Monday (7am-5pm) : Meeting with regards to an overhaul of the rubrics in future report cards. These newly holistic report cards will replace the current ones with immediate effect. While the former report cards normally took 2 weeks to consolidate the required data, the new ones require up to 4-5 weeks of vigorous keyboard activity.

Tuesday (7am - 7pm): National Day Organising Committee Meeting till 4pm. Proceeded with tuition till 7pm.

Wednesday ( 7am - 5.30pm): Briefing for PSLE Oral Examiners at Toa Payoh HDB Hub from 3 to 5.30pm. This is the third year I'm appointed to be an Oral Examiner. (Read: While the other teachers enjoy holidays totalling 4 days during the P6 Prelim & PSLE respectively, I'd be listening to dreary drones. Mental Note: Bring on the tea!) Comfort came in the form of a Cookie Summit at Swensen's prior to the briefing. Contact Time ended earlier than expected and we had an hour to spare. The waitress screwed up our orders and soup was on the house as compensation.

Thursday (7am - 5.15pm): Timetable was packed to the brim. I was interrupted barely 5 minutes into recess by the last minute "URGENT" request to vet the CA2 Paper on the spot. Final vetting will be done after school on Friday. I'm rather peeved at being either the vetter or setter for every single English exam since 2003. Allocated duty for the P1 Registration Exercise (Phase 2B). I absolutely dread my annual job at the computer terminal, keying in relevant data, namely due to the sole responsibility to be shouldered if anything went awry. This stressful period ended at 4.30pm. Tied up some loose ends at work before leaving at 5.15pm.

Friday (7am - 10pm): CCA to be carried out. Following that, an unprecedented Meet-the-Parents session is to be be held from 7pm-9.30pm. (expected extension till 10pm) I foresee increased sightings of zombies within that witching time frame.


Total Number of hours slept so far (ie. Monday, Tues, Wed): 9 hours
Total Number of cups of tea downed so far (mon-thurs) : 16

Melon Collie

Enter a myriad of cascading emotions. Whirling within the spirals of logic, a voice yearns to be heard. Whisper in my ears. Tell me what this is all about. Extend a semblance of tangible grasps, for the current clutching of straws is futile. Guileless fancies frittered away. Questions arise. Guide me in the nuances of life. Irreversible intersections recur over time. I question their compounded significance.

An empty hollow. I feel it. The echoes reverberate, revolving in that vast vacuum. Conjure a kaleidoscope of flippant images. Imaginary yet surreal. Entice me. Immerse me in the succulent colours of life. There is a need to relish the moments. Take time to smell the flowers. Swoop me from rehearsed rut. I want to indulge with opulent deliberation and anticipation. Furrow is to be forsaken. Dip your brush and streak sharded rainbows. Provide this window, a personal haven of discarded facades.

Delving with Del

Leeion had to work today and so, lunch was off. =(

Met up with Del (yes, the one who wrote the poem) for dinner at 7.30pm. Del intrigues me all the time. He's intelligent, humble, accomodating, considerate, sincere.... the list goes on. He's the best confidant I've known for the last nine years. Suffice to say, his company is much appreciated. However, work has kept us apart and we're not able to meet up as frequently as before.

Time spent with Del is always an adventure as he likes to explore and indulge in non-conventional activities or scour obscure places. Dinner was at an Indian restaurant tucked away in a quiet street. Our tastebuds were in for a treat with the spread of rich butter naan, crispy chapati, delectable tandoori chicken & titillating fish curry. Del kept on piling naan on my plate, resulting in a pie chart of different naans.

After that, we journeyed to a neighbouring pub which comprised a majority of Caucasians. The live band was fantastic and the mood was right. Del drank a pint of beer and we shared a bottle of white wine. As the bench was too low, Del attempted to elevate the digital camera by placing his handphone across the mouth of his glass. This acted as a platform for the digital camera to be propped on. Joking about the possibility of his phone drowning in his glass of beer, we took a few pictures. Alas! The joke turned out to be a self-fulfilling prophecy! He knocked his phone right into his glass and that damaged his SIM card. He was tickled pink although I felt partly responsible for that. =(

Exhausted by 1am, we went home. Del is like the brother I never had. I'm looking forward to meet up with Del again!

Aplomb Danceland & Events of the Day

I'm too drained to type in coherent paragraphs. Summary of the day's events:

• Aplomb Danceland, a professional dance troupe, performed 4 contemporary dances during assembly. Liased with the leader after being notified LAST NIGHT. They were supposed to arrive at 6.45 am. I waited half an hour before they finally arrived at 7.15am and the leader apologised sheepishly over the phone. I caught sight of him waving at me across the hall. Thanks to the efficient prefects, everything was set up by 7.30am. Phew. Howie, the leader, was extremely cute! With a dimpled grin and amazing eyes, he bore a striking resemblance to Takeshi Kaneshiro. Jia actually smsed "You lucky thing! He's hot!" Bantered with him backstage. Exchange of smses when he'd left the premises. =)
  
• Cleared a tonne of admin work before recess.
  
• Actually forgot to eat during recess.
  
• Called Dank and fumbled while searching for discount privileges on seafood restaurants at East Coast. Sorry, Dank! Was multi-tasking while on the phone.
  
• Proposed liasing with an orphanage for peer-to-peer communication with my class. Mental note: Need to bring it up to the P. HOD, ST & VP have given the go-ahead. -crosses fingers-
• DD's arrival tomorrow. Fida has been chosen to model a lesson for the DD. Shared with her my experience in 2002, when measures were taken to ensure that the DD left with a good impression of the school based on a single lesson by an individual. Highly stressful situation. Walkie talkies and timekeepers were engaged as the DD moved from one point to another. All the best to Fida!
• Contact Time was interrupted with a parent wanting to see me urgently. It took an hour to resolve the dispute between the subject teacher of my class and the parent.
  
• CCA followed immediately after that. Ended at 3.30pm. I'd forgotten about lunch as well! Geez!
• Rushed to give tuition at 4pm. Ended at 6pm.
• Leion volunteered to be my partner for future salsa classes. Yaay~
  
• Meeting Leion (lunch) and Del (dinner) on Friday.
  
• Mum lost her wallet and $300 together with her IC, credit cards, etc.
  
• WY called. Chatted for an hour.
  
• ZY called from Australia. His resignation from the previous job was a calculated risk. He's now a headhunter. Promised to return in December.
• LC and Di are heading home soon! Looking forward to see them again!
• 1.20am, staring at the screen. Typing with my eyes closed.
  
• Goodnight!
  

mid-life crisis

I suspect a mid-life crisis lurks in the shadows, pouncing on me when my guard is down.

Lately,or rather, in the month of June, I've been jostled out of my comfort zone with a string of activities (or at least, attempts) which normally do not catch my fancy.....
- attempting to strum the guitar (hopefully yamaha will fit my schedule next year)
- checked out yamaha's drum classes
- bought a load of Elle gymwear (have not exercised in a decade!)
- baked chocolate chip cookies (it was a 4 hour ordeal but the product was yummy~)
- wanted to enrol in driving / biking lessons (efforts nullified with my aforementioned red-green deficiency)
- considered cable-skiing (yes, i know i've hydrophobia and can't swim >.< )
- intensive clubbing / pubbing within the last week of the hols and over this weekend
- Researching with crystal on dancing schools which offer salsa courses
- considering other professional avenues

There's an inexplicable desire for radical changes.
Premature midlife crisis? Perhaps. --sigh--

Sitting, waiting, wishing

Another lazy blog entry....Jack Johnson's the flavour of the day! Acoustics ~~

"Sitting, Waiting, Wishing"

Now I was sitting waiting wishing
That you believed in superstitions
Then maybe you'd see the signs
But Lord knows that this world is cruel
And I ain't the Lord, no I'm just a fool
Learning loving somebody don't make them love you

Must I always be waiting waiting on you?
Must I always be playing playing your fool?

I sing ya songs I dance a dance
I gave ya friends all a chance
Putting up with them wasn't worth never having you
And maybe you been through this before
But its my first time
So please ignore
The next few lines cause they're directed at you

I cant always be waiting waiting on you
I cant always be playing playing your fool
I keep playing your part
But its not my scene
Wont this plot not twist?
I've had enough mystery.
Keep building me up, then shooting me down
Well im already down
Just wait a minute
Just sitting waiting
Just wait a minute
Just sitting waiting

Well if I was in your position
Id put down all my ammunition
I'd wondered why'd it taken me so long
But Lord knows that I'm not you
And If I was I wouldn't be so cruel
Cause waiting on love ain't so easy to do

Must I always be waiting waiting on you?
Must I always be playing playing your fool?
No I cant always be waiting waiting on you
I cant always be playing playing your fool, foool