Mich : Makeup Model of the Day!

It was a blast!

Mel, an old college buddy of mine, had invited me to be her makeup model for the day.

A cynic of cosmetics that were alien to my hypersensitive skin, I decided to throw caution to the wind and was all game for it.

The venue was inundated with eager participants and I was initially a tad overwhelmed at the sheer number of people who'd turned up for this event.

With a positive attitude in tow, I steered my mind towards an opportunity for experiential learning.

As Mel applied the different products with deft strokes, they glided across my skin with nary a sting nor itch that I'd been accustomed to.

My skepticism towards organic & mineral makeup dissipated as the minutes went by. I was sold!

A soft and dewy finish wowed the audience. (I loved my look too!)

Most of the participants did not leave empty-handed and bagged some products that were showcased.

Armed with new nifty techniques from Mel's workshop, I took the liberty of purchasing some items as well.

Stay tuned for peektures over the weekend! =)

Blink.

10.42 AM
The curvature defies inertia.

Tootsday!

It's Tuesday!

A flurry of events await yet again.

6 locations, 5 activities and perhaps a really late dinner (read : supper) with a pal if we're up for it!

As for now, I shall be in a state of inertia for the next 4 hours. (read : snoozefest)

Happy Tootsday to all! =)

Snatches of Time.

Objects and other nouns vie for my attention in the coming hours.

An imperative amount of caffeine (read : gargantuan) will allow me to get everything done (read : bulldoze) by nightfall.

Erstwhile, here's a little nugget of information that I'd picked up from Daniel minutes ago - it's Cyber Monday!

Time to turn in now.

Tucked in bed are 4 hours of cognitive lull before sensory overload hits the road.

Adios!

Somewhere Over The Rainbow

Trust Glee to deliver on a tweaked oldie. 6 spins aren't enough! =)

Somewhere over the rainbow
Way up high,
There's a land that I heard of
Once in a lullaby.

Somewhere over the rainbow
Skies are blue,
And the dreams that you dare to dream
Really do come true.

Someday I'll wish upon a star
And wake up where the clouds are far
Behind me.
Where troubles melt like lemon drops
Away above the chimney tops
That's where you'll find me.

Somewhere over the rainbow
Bluebirds fly.
Birds fly over the rainbow.
Why then, oh why can't I?

If happy little bluebirds fly
Beyond the rainbow
Why, oh why can't I?

~ Matthew Morrison

Eyes Wide Shut.

Goodnight, my Love.

I can only contain it all within these parameters.

Hoping.

I want to grow old with You.

Optional : Moolah

Money is not Everything.

It is but a cloak to shroud Unhappiness.

You-logy.

Who are You?
Do you know that you are You?
Conversely, it is true that You are you.

It is You.

It is, you.

Home.

Home is where the heart is. And my heart is with ... You. Ingrained is The Song with encapsulated moments of You, by You, from You.

And I've been keeping all the letters that I wrote to you. Each one a line or two, "I'm fine, Baby. How are you?"
**************************************
And I feel just like I'm living someone else's life. It's like I just stepped outside when everything was going right.

And I know just why you could not come along with me, that this was not your dream but you always believed in me.
**************************************
Let me go home. It'll all be all right. I'll be home tonight. I'm coming back home.

~ Michael Buble, Home

Dream.

I'd like to grow old with You.

And So It Is.

And so it is
Just like you said it would be
Life goes easy on me
Most of the time
And so it is
The shorter story
No love, no glory
No hero in her sky

I can't take my eyes off you
I can't take my eyes off you
I can't take my eyes off you
I can't take my eyes off you
I can't take my eyes off you
I can't take my eyes...

And so it is
Just like you said it should be
We'll both forget the breeze
Most of the time
And so it is
The colder water
The blower's daughter
The pupil in denial

I can't take my eyes off of you
I can't take my eyes off you
I can't take my eyes off of you
I can't take my eyes off you
I can't take my eyes off you
I can't take my eyes...

Did I say that I loathe you?
Did I say that I want to
Leave it all behind?

I can't take my mind off of you
I can't take my mind off you
I can't take my mind off of you
I can't take my mind off you
I can't take my mind off you
I can't take my mind...
My mind...my mind...
Till I find somebody new 
~ Damien Rice, The Blower's Daughter

Sound Advice.

Chanced upon this -

"Helping others helps you to discard your pain. It also reminds you of all the good stuff in your life."

How true.

Reality.

And so, a new day has come.

It was a beautiful dream come true. =)
Relish it.
Remember it.
Hold it close.

Now, back to reality.
Forward, Mich.

昨天的恋曲，美丽的惊喜。=)

暖暖的,
轻轻地，
甜甜地,

虽然只是那刹那的温暖与幸福,
在那短短的时间，只有你、只有我。

很庆幸，很被爱，很幸福。

八年的期待 －

你终于与我共度了最重要的日子。

我没有过问，因为我知道。
我早就看穿了。我也知道过后的一切。

把这美丽的回忆牢牢地记在心里。

很珍惜好不容易得来的一段过去。

这一天的快乐，虽短斩，但我终于等到了。

在两个人的世界，能紧握住我所等待的幸福，那已足够了。

你曾祝福我说，“天天快乐。”
昨天，我终于快乐了。

过后，我就得从昨天梦幻的世界里回到今天现实的原点。

Insomnia.

Selective Amnesia.
Forward.

This Day.

Thank You,
For not taking this day away from me.
For remembering.

Cr00ked Lines.

Pleasantly surprised.
He's not You.
But, he's trying. =)
God writes straight with crooked lines
He takes the mess we make in life
He turns our groaning into perfect rhyme.
Hidden by the veil of time,
The wisdom of His love’s design,
God writes straight with crooked lines.

I’ve had days as dark as smoke
When it hurt too much to hope
And it felt like the pain would never end.

Oh, searching for answers but finding jokes
Limping along the winding road,
Certain He left me all alone.

When it’s hard to trust that there is a greater plan,
Like a child, I’ve gotta just hold His hand. ~ Extracted from Crooked Lines, Corrinne May

Happy Birthday, Mich.

我知道伤心不能改变什么
I know that sadness will not change things.
那么 让我诚实一点
Thus, let me be honest.
诚实 难免有不能控制的宣泄
Honesty invariably reveals unbridled truths.
只要关上了门 不必理谁
All it takes is to shut the door and the world along with it.

一个人坐在空荡包厢里面
Alone in the ventricle,
手机 让它休息一夜
The phone is silent for a night.
难 像切歌切掉回忆的画面
With surmounting difficulty, forged memories are expunged like fragmented melodies.
眼泪不能流过十二点
These tears - they shall not fall beyond the stroke of midnight.

生日快乐 我对自己说
"Happy Birthday," I mutter to myself.
蜡烛点了 寂寞亮了
The candles are lit and so, loneliness illuminates.
生日快乐 泪也融了
Happy Birthday. A trickle falls.
我要谢谢你给的你拿走的一切
I must thank you for giving me all that you've since taken away.

还爱你 带一点恨
My love for You lingers with a tinge of bitterness.
还要时间 才能平衡
It will take some time for the pain to subside.
热恋伤痕 幻灭重生
Deep hurts and broken dreams arise yet again.
祝我生日快乐
Happy Birthday to Me.

Then.

1,2,3,4,5.
Once I caught a fish alive.
6,7,8,9,10.
Then I let it go again.

Why did you let it go?
Because it bit my finger so.
Which finger did it bite?
This little finger on my right.

~ Childhood Nursery Rhyme

Forward.

I'd cast aside everything to wait.
8 years frittered away to make up for what I'd believed was my deepest regret in letting You go.

Then August 2012 arrived.
I'd foolishly thought that ______.

You could have told me the truth.
But you didn't.
You said You'd ____, ____ and _____.
Like a naive fool, I believed every word You'd said.

And continued to wait.

Happy as a lark, I went about my way and beamed as the days passed.

You could have but you kept mum.
Was it intentional? A deliberate blow for that particular night all those years ago?

I'm not broken, for my heart has died in 2007 and I've not been the same ever since.

This time, I'm numb.

I've no more tears left to shed nor do I wish to weave theories of What Ifs and Whys.

It is easy for me to turn tail and flee once again.

But I won't.

Not this time.

Not anymore.

Forward.

Windmills of my Mind.

By day, I get dressed;

my choice of garment is laced with a straight face.

By night, I pull these loins off;

they crinkle with my mien

as we collapse in a heap.

Of Alpha Bets & Numb-ers.

Let's have a bet.
Spin the tale now.

ABCDEFG,
HIJKLMNOP,
QRS,
TUV,
WX,
Y&Z.

Which is my fave amongst the Alphabet Alpha Bet?

It doesn't quite matter now, does it?

Oh, bother.

Here comes the Numb-ers.

What a mangled mess!

That, Dad.

Hey, Dad.

It's me.

I finally understand you.

It's been 2.5 years since you died but for some reason, I've only been able to analyse & deduce certain things at this moment.

Much as you were largely missing (literally) throughout my adult life, it is only now that we share this common thread.

Nothing happens by chance.
Everything happens for a reason.

It took That for me to realise this after cartwheels inundated my faculty of mind.

Dad, I'm really, really sad right now and there's nobody who'd understand it but you.

Of all people, it's you, whom I was never close to nor gotten along with.

It's you, the one who'd left when I was 21 and appeared a decade later in the form of a lifeless body.

Maybe that's why you gave up on life.

Perhaps that's why you'd chosen to walk into the hospital with your documents in tow on the eve of your passing, fully aware that death was nigh.

You had it all thought out.

You'd chosen to die.

It was a conscious choice.

And as the infection sapped remnant life from your being, you were released from that which you'd repressed all these years.

You were a CFA, an accountant of repute at one point. Such excellence had your boss rewarding you with a Rolex and fat bonuses.

Yet, all these fell away. You were nothing but a shrivelled figure, depleted of the pulsating drivel which pervaded life when my eyes fell upon you.

Your heart had died. And so had you.

Hey, Dad.

It's me.

And I, understand you. Finally.

In Deed.

The verb 'did' denotes a past activity. Ah, yes, the spoils of grammar.
Well I didn't mean for this to go as far as it did
And I didn't mean to get so close and share what we did
And I didn't mean to fall in love, but I did
And you didn't mean to love me back, but I know you did

And I didn't mean to meet you then
When we were just kids...
...And I didn't mean to fall in love, but I did
And you didn't mean to love me back but I know you did.

Don't say you didn't love me back coz you know you did
No, you didn't mean to love me back,
But You did. (Plain White T's, A Lonely September) Class dismissed. The Lesson's over.

Wanderful.

I circle my jar of spiders. Out of sheer exhaustion, I take off the lid and slide in. I tell them to go ahead, eat me alive.

Still, I’m haunted by implications. Something whispers that I’m only living half a life. And the half I’m living is coming way too fast. I’m on the down escalator trying to run up, but no matter how fast I run, I stay in the same spot — always a little agitated, a little lost, a little hungry.

Me, I’m the emptiness inside the jar, though the jar itself has vanished. I’m spacious and peaceful and vast. I like this place. As always, I resolve to remember what a relief this is.

As usual, I forget and get trapped outside again. Circling the jar.

~ Margit Hesthammar, New York Times
Read the full article here

Deluged.

All this while, she's been breathing under water.

Nothing Neu.

Neuropsychiatry fascinates me.

Having studied cognitive psychology, neuropsychiatry is a no-brainer (pardon the pun!) in my areas of interest.

What about you? What tickles your fancy, dear random reader? =)

Still Waters.

The prefrontal cortex is that part of the brain that mediates emotional response to stimuli.

The prefrontal cortex joins with the amygdala, which governs how short-term memory gets converted into long-term memory.

The amygdala also provides the association between a strong emotional reaction and how that reaction gets stored in long-term memory.

When the prefrontal cortex and the amygdala dysfunction, the checks and balances in terms of memory association can be thrown off.

In other words, you can have either off-the-charts emotional reactions to events or no reaction at all.

It is the emotional "memory" of an event that allows it to be recorded into long-term memory.

Source : Mayo Clinic

Absolutely.

August 30, 2012 -
What if I'd said Yes on that very day?
Would it .... ?

There are no What Ifs, Mich.
Only absolutes.

A Part.

10 days.
Resilience.

Fort Mich.

Emotions gnash and gurgle in the ventricle that beats ever so faintly.

The bitterness of 2007 is lacking.

Sadness, anger and hurt are the spoils of the whacked-up pinata.

It is Anniversary Sunday in the Place where it all began.

There, my presence you will not find. Not today. But I'll be back in a week.

Maybe it's with age or perhaps it is out of habit, but I've yet to plunge into an abyss which plagued much of 2007-2008 till You looked me up again.

After the trickles, a hollow echoes within. Sediment layers upon itself till an outpouring is warranted. Then Time merely helps itself to the fruits of its labour.

That is how it has been all this while.

And I guess it is no different this time.

8 years.

Several cycles.

Hold your fort, Mich.

Greef. (Misnomer Intended)

I'd beLIEved.
There's a lie in that.

Too.

Two much.
Two little.

Two late.

Sill-y

A crutch that reigns,
This smile she feigns.