Ignition.

"You look very chio today," he quipped. I smiled and waved as I nestled into my seat.

('Chio' is a local slang that is used to compliment a pretty female. However, it can be perceived as being derogatory or rude if one does not share a close relationship with said female.)

He got up to accompany me in the snaking queue and left the rest twittering (of the verbal kind) amongst themselves.

He gushed over my shoes.
Then my bag.
It was then that my mind drifted to the time when You were still an undergraduate. The purchase of your bike and car had yet to transpire. Upon realising that the bus you were on had passed my location, you called and asked if I was alone and if You could keep me company. Elated, I was, however, with a friend and had to turn you down, albeit after a long chat.

In another year, I was to meet Di & De. You asked if You could come along. We stood in the queue for eons before we got a table. It was then that De commented, "...I would have thought that he (You) was your guy."

The unmistakable smile and wave that have come to be part of my identity were once again unfurled when our eyes met at the Concierge. That was a year ago.

I cannot must shake off this past.

I had, have and am trying to.

It took me a decade to finally know You and come 2014, another decade would soon go by.

That once feisty and cheerful girl is now weathered.

She'd scarcely noticed the years slipping by,

Till now.

Watch This.

Every now and then, a reel of sorts latches itself and refuses to budge.

End of Watch is an excellent movie, starring Jake Gyllenhaal and Anna Kendrick. (Aside : Yours truly has watched every movie that features Jake Gyllenhaal or Leonardo DiCaprio.)

While the film expounds on the dangers of upholding justice and the threats posed by cartels, it is far from a police-versus-mob cliche. The script is sharp and its cinematography is authentic.

While death weaves itself into the plot, it announces its finality at the end and is certain to send a sledgehammer hurtling right into your subconscious.

Juxtaposing against the grim outcome is this mise–en–scène.

Unscripted, it was secretly filmed by the director as they were driving to Las Vegas. The cacaphony of fact and fiction lends credence to the theme of disarray.

That hair flick and coy glance - Anna Kendrick clearly has a thing or two for Jake Gyllenhaal in reality.

Instead of the gruesome bits, it is this cheerful clip that grips me.

For it reminds me of the times I was in your car -
When you were at the wheel,
And I was the Happiest girl in the world.

Keeping Mum.

When I was 16, my form teacher engaged us in a discussion about our future.

I'd wanted to be a lawyer or a social worker.

Today, I'm neither; I'm a teacher. I love what I do and I'm very good at it.

When I was 18, I told everyone that I wanted to be married at 24.

Today, I tell my students to live their dreams and wait till 30. Having done that, 24 was way too young to have signed my life away on a legal document.

When I was 22, I dreamt of a lil Michie pottering around by the time I was 30.

Today, I'm 34.

"You're waiting for him,aren't you?" was something that a friend had queried That Night when I was 25.

When inquisitive people badger me, my convenient excuse is, "No time."

"Eeew, no," is another favourite red herring.

I dreamt of lil Michie today.

She was clad in a yellow dress and twirled around with ribbons. She covered her mouth and giggled. As I reached for her hand, she asked, "Mummy, you want me but why won't you have me?" and I woke up in tears.

I have no answer to that, lil One.

Because I want your life to be perfect and free from pain. I want every memory of yours to be Happy. You don't have to be the brightest spark or incredibly talented. All I ask is for a Happy & Healthy you. I will love you very, very much.

I had a fantastic childhood. And right now, I cannot promise you that.

So in my dreams you'll have to linger, lil One.

Until I decide to have you.

When I do, I'll never get rid of you. No, no. You'll be too precious come what may.

Erstwhile, I'm sorry.