Bummer!

As a reward for outstanding work performance, the Man will be on a yacht in less than 12 hours.

Mich isn't allowed to tag along as this is strictly limited to employees of the financial company.

The Sun...
The Wind....
The Clouds...
The Sea.....

Bummer! =(

Premonition?

On Thursday (as mentioned in dated blog entry), Mich dreamt of Senator Barack Obama delivering a speech, complete with punchlines she'd written.

Today, Barack Obama received 55.4% of the vote (with a decisive 81% of Black support) in the South Carolina primary against Hillary Clinton & a trailing John Edwards.

Coincidence?

Premonition?

[ Aside : Mich reckons that the Republican presence in these primaries matters little in the presidential race as the nation desperately seeks an agent of change and really, nobody needs another Southern, white, male Republican like McCain. Nor Romney. Nor Huckabee. And certainly not Giuliani. ]

2008 Presidential Election

You know you're obsessed with the current US presidential campaign when you :

• actively search for youtube clips on speeches by various candidates on a daily basis.
• fervently pore through articles online with respect to the ongoing mudslinging and lapping up every detail.
• admire Obama & Edwards for their character, charisma and earnest appeal but have the conviction that Clinton will emerge victorious given her experience on foreign policy & clinical stance on domestic issues. [ The lady's dogmatic on statistics and detailed accuracy. ]
• consider burrowing through political fodder like Time & Newsweek as nightly bedtime leisure reads.
• ( This takes the cake ) ......dream of Obama delivering a speech.Complete with punchlines that you wrote.

Take this quiz on the Washington Post to discover which candidate you agree with on issues.


Mich's results - Hillary Clinton evidently outstripping the rest.

Mich took the Democratic edition and had the stinking feeling that the vast majority of her25 answers were aligned with Clinton's adopted stance. She was more than right. The result? An overwhelming number of answers tallied with Clinton's. Gee!

Meet These Girls In Your Area! [Uh Huh.]

I don't know about you, but to have taglined ads screeching "Meet These Girls In Your Area!" and the like does leave one perturbed, particularly if the website you're on has a subject matter that is the least affiliated with such notions, if you get my drift.

What caught my attention was meeting "stacie0823" at Pasir Gudang, Singapore. ( It's interesting to note that the featured girls who "await you" are predominantly white, but I won't delve into that.)

I'll admit that I had no inkling of Pasir Gudang's exact location and so, Google did its little magic.

Pasir Gudang is an industrial town located 35 km east of Johor Bahru in Malaysia (LAT: 01°2′6″N, 103°5′4″E). It is the western end of the Johor Bahru metropolitan area. The population is around 70,000. It is connected by the 4 lane Pasir Gudang Highway, a trunk road, and a railway line to Johor Bahru. The main industries are transportation and logistics, shipbuilding, petrochemicals and other heavy industries, and oil palm storage and distribution. It is the site of one of two major power stations in the state of Johor, the Sultan Iskandar Power station.

Oh, dang. I'll have to pass up the chance on "stacie0823".

I would, however, like to meet "dfn31" in "Johor Bahru, Singapore" and inform her that the black corset clashes with her platinum blonde hair.

Sheesh!

A Hamster's Legacy - Hammie's Babies

Two of Hammie's babies.

One's propped herself up against the cage while the other's content to snuggle by her side.

Awww.... =)

Think Before You Speak.

Is lauding one's achievements an imperative to be taken seriously or, at the very least, to avoid being disparaged?

To boast of what I have, to list connections or otherwise, is not a strategm employed. Circumventing talk about my job, my finances or what expensive gadgets/items I've purchased underlies the notion that these subjects are of incognito and should bear no consequence to fraternal relations.

If I must, here's a sample:

• My new job entails a paycheque of $5k. [ Juxtaposed against peers with salaries of $10k and above, that sum pales in comparison but I'm happy that it is a notch above the average income. ]
• In my previous job, I was forced into a promotion of Music Coordinator after two consecutive years of refusing to accept the positions of Art Coordinator & English Coordinator. [ I know You think nothing of that, but where I was, being a Coordinator means you're well on your way to HOD in time to come. ]
• Being the sole person to be selected for a full-scale lesson observation under the watchful eyes of the visiting Permanent Secretary of the Ministry was definitely a highlight in my career.
• My command of the language precipitated the vetting of most English examination papers throughout the year.
• I was one of the only two to be selected for the Singapore Examinations and Assessment Board for PSLE.
• A bill amounting to $10k was chalked up for just my wedding photographs at Chris Ling's, the renowned wedding photograper in Singapore.
• The cost of my wedding gowns alone was $3k.
• My diamond ring from the Man, a solitaire of 0.72 carats, is a whisker away from $10k.
• The Man's changed his car twice in 3 years.
• Connections with the Uppers resulted in a decision by the Uppers to override a certain principal,with the situation in favour of me and a personal trip made by the Uppers. The aforementioned principal had to eat humble pie and upon the realisation of Mich's connections with the Uppers, attempted to burrow her way into Mich's good books instead. What a sorry sight that was!
• Almost all my relatives on the maternal side are millionaires.
• A certain Minister used to pop by often at my grandmother's home (where I spent most afternoons with Mum) to chat with Uncle. As his constant appearance and boisterous laughter disrupted the peace required for academia, it annoyed me!
• My cousin owns a recording company and counts Dick Lee, Jacintha, Tracy Huang and the like as his earlier prodigies.
• Mum and MM Goh share the same godmother. [ Can You beat that? ]
• Mum's best friend, who owns several hotels in the USA, is the niece of the deceased Moti Melwani. The 3 pioneers of the Melwani empire were fond of Mum and a part of my childhood was spent playing at their homes. [ For the uninitiated, the Melwanis are one of the most prolific socialites in Singapore. International brands like Levi's are under the belt of their organisation. ]
• Currently, my closest childhood friends are Assistant Directors in 2 Ministries and another is the right-hand lady of a Minister.
• I'm often quoted in the local newspapers and articles have been written based on my opinions.
• Much personal time has been spent with children whose lives have been changed. Their mothers have written long letters of gratitude. [ I know that You're under the impression that Mich can scarcely teach, much less influence, mould and transform children. ]

Am I starting to sound like an annoying showoff?

That is precisely why I do not see the need to list pompous details or even make mere mention of them. Adopting a stance of grandiose and enunciating the magnitude of their influence or capability seems to be an artful pursuit by some. The comprehension of such ilk eludes me. Likewise, it is not my priority to assume the role of an attention-seeker - wielding many acquaintances, but confidante to none.

Character, Loyalty & Integrity are what I value and seek in friends.

So should You think of Mich as a pampered princess, a less-than productive worker, a bimbotic giggler and the like, think before You belittle her.

She doesn't need acknowledgement nor gratification arising from peer envy.

Mich is not as superficial as You are. For every notch up the ladder, Mich reminds herself that there will always be someone who is richer/more capable/more deserving. Material possessions are but of germane transience. Your vexatious character is fleshed out upon the postulating of oneself as the constant Leader / Big Brother or Sister / Boss.

Confidence and sheer Arrogance toe the line precariously on opposing ends.

Thus, she beseeches You to undertake a fraction of Humility, to resist the impertinence of exulting what You have and instead, to focus your eyes on being contented with Your lot in life, to be a Giver & Helper, whoever You may be.

Tuzki 兔斯基

Taken from startdrawing.org

These bunnies known as Tuzki are the latest to steal the hearts of Chinese netizens.

Simplistic, noseless and mouthless, these bunnies have been hot on Chinese internet, particularly with QQ and MSN users since the beginning of 2007. Wang Momo, a student in animation department of Beijing Broadcasting Institute created this popular lagomorph.

Wang Momo created this character to be able to write her diary in a graphic form. Her friends and classmates always nicknamed her “rabbit” as well. The first Tuzki was very simple, and just waved his arms and shook his head. Then Momo created more pictures and small animations for this character based on her real life experiences. To date, Tuzki has 39 different expressions. And thanks to the 150,000,000 Tecent QQ users and 20 million MSN messenger users in China, the popularity of Tuzki also generates income for this young woman. She is now designing Tuzki posters and postcards, which will take the rabbit beyond the definition of an internet idol.

The use of cartoon icons when chatting with others via MSN Messenger is considered an internet phenomenon started by the younger generations in China. At first it started with Yoyo & Cici,a launch by Chinajoy at the beginning of 2006, driven by commercial purposes. Later in 2006, the cartoon Onion replaced the Yoyo & Cici Monkeys to be the most popular internet icon. Currently, Tzuki is the new fad. 

[Extracts from Shanghaiist]

Transmogrification.

It was only upon introduction to this song some time ago (Leion, was it at Kallang Leisure?) did this apparent hit by 卜學亮 - 子曰, a pseudo-Mando-rap of Confucius sayings, register a familiarity. [ The gist's just about all I can comprehend! ]



So, as luck would have it, the maltreatment of Grateful Days by Dragon Ash received flak.



Well, what do you know? Dragon Ash's rendition was a chip off Today by The Smashing Pumpkins.



So much for originality, eh?

I Saw You in Me.

I trashed a long piece that I'd written. In its place, is this song of 22 words that goes on for 6 minutes :

I saw you.
In me.

I saw you.
In me.

It's so sad,
Sad to say.

It's so sad,
Sad to say.


Regardless of what I'd felt, what had happened, what was said and what wasn't, it's all come to pass.

I used to wake up, wondering what message you would have sent in the middle of the night and a curve spread across my face when the words that meant nothing to the rest of the world sat and nestled in me.

Meeting you was a fantasy I'd never dared dream would be fulfilled. To be seated across you, face to face, was my childhood fleshing itself between.

The calls, the questions, the silly exchanges, the gifts, meant much to me, if little to you.

I saw You in me.

I thought I'd finally found You. You brought my dream to life, breathing colours of existence in this being.

Silence hinged on Hope.

What I'd wanted to say, I didn't. What I did was out of fear that I'd lose You should things be spelt out. And that, I have done quite splendidly, I must say.

It was wrong to begin with.

When tears fell, You were my comfort. You smiled and said things would be all right. I believed you.

I was ready to grasp with both hands, but it was then that You loosened your grip.

You asked if I were happy, if you'd made me happy. My answer to You, finally is, YES. But it's too late, isn't it? This answer is more than a tad too late. Years have gone by and still.

Behind closed doors, beneath the cheery facade, is a face drenched in tears. In the still of the night, tucked out of sight, Mich cries. Her tears mark the Regret, the Unspoken, the Lost, the What-ifs and the Whys.

You're not coming back for Mich.

I'll never know why You did what You did. Was it was to pay me in my own coin? Was it to prove a point? Was it to satiate your ego? Or was everyone wrong? Was it a figment of my own imagination?

Oh, silly me.

Who am I talking to?

You aren't here. Are You?

Where's Mich?

Worry not, ( or conversely, cheer not? ) for Mich hasn't vanished into thin air. Mich has been really busy over the weekend and doesn't forsee a lull till the end of the week.

A paradigm shift with the Factor that propogates the notion - proximity.

And with distance, Mich is moving on.

In every sense of the word.

Alea Jacta Est - Season Finale. (I suspect only Alex is in the loop with regards to this euphemism. *nudge nudge*)

A new day has come! =)

If We Too.

"As time passes, you're becoming more important to me," so said the Man.

Something within her snapped.

And she'd come to realise.

Friday, 10 January 2008.

• I had dinner with Ting from 8pm to 4.30am.
• It was to be my last day.
• Hammie died.

For some reason, I burst into tears sporadically throughout the day.

Goodbye, Hammie.

I will miss you.

Of Yins and Youngs.

I am a Chinese who's not quite Chinese, yet my identification papers yield me as such. I was thrown into a Chinese school based on my academic credentials in everything but Chinese. I got by Higher Chinese examinations by translating everything in my Chinese textbooks into English and memorizing model Chinese sentences. That saved me from a fat zero in sentence construction which was an examination prerequisite.

Home indoctrination propelled me with an inclination towards the English language and culture, weaning on British reading material particularly. Chinese New Year was viewed as a hassle and festivals affiliated with Chinese legends did not register a familarity but Christmas was celebrated with much pomp. Chinese music flooded my ears and I watched Chinese drama serials fervently during prime time. (yes, even the saccharine Qiong Yao serials, but not without a heavy reliance on my precious English subtitles, of course!)

Yet, I was far from being a Chinese maven.

I couldn't speak Mandarin without sounding peculiar. (My friends used to comment that I had the accent of an angmoh when I tried to babble in Mandarin. There's a marked improvement now!) While burrowing through English books was a breeze, trying to string Chinese words and making sense of them in a sentence was particularly taxing on the brain.

Despite being bereft of this language ability, my choice of partners is stagnated within the Chinese gene pool. In a twist of irony, I steer clear of the Caucasian male and am aghast at the Pinkerton Syndrome.

I am a not-quite-Chinese Chinese.
Hear me roar.....in English?

The Progression of Being Stupid.

photograph by Cedrus

1. Transfix your gaze on a random figure.
2. Construct a pedestal.
3. Linger with stares of seismic proportions.
4. Pirouette days, months and years away.
5. Whoop for joy when Opportunity knocks.
6. Fritter away time, money and other aspects of Life.
7. Allow friendships to break down due to avoidance.
8. Be smug about the embroiled state of affairs.
9. Smoulder behind smokescreens.
10. Be contented with the blistering tag of a virtual non-existent public persona.
11. Pat yourself on the back in glee when tête-à-tête commences behind closed doors.
12. By all means, putting oneself up for an auction in Hurt is permissible. Stakes are high after all.
13. Watch as the object of affection comes and goes as it pleases. Ties are bestowed, you tell yourself.
14. Allow said figure to formulate verbal coagulations and perform its magic to raise eyebrows.
15. Repeat procedure, only this time, with friends.
16. Opt for the failproof method that entails maintaining the state of equlibrium lest it rocks the boat.
17. Let Silence hinge on Hope.
18. Repress all there is to say, offering pleasantries instead.
19. Dwell with Escapism within literary perimeters such as this.
20. Accumulate Experience with tricky trigonometry.
21. As events are dealt out, remain as pleased as punch that all looks good on your side.
22. Fan out the cards, convinced that You have a winning hand.
23. Let down your guard for once, with Vulnerability exposed, thereby asking for Trouble.
24. Wallow and spiral into depression when aforementioned persona delivers a backhand blow.
25. Congratulate oneself for forming new alliances with Pretence and Patience.
26. Tunnel deeper and pile the pickets.
27. Find solace in a newfound onomatopoeic hobby - Crying.
28. Abandon groundwork due to proximity.
29. Assemble regimented contexts.
30. Wait for a Word.

There You go.

Oh my, what a pun.

A Hike of the Expensive Kind.

By now, the topic of the hike in cab fares has been mentioned ad nauseum.

Prior to the steep increase, I had no idea that my monthly expenditure on taxi fares was equivalent to the GDP of a third-world nation. Right, I jest. Seriously, I was literally flagging away close to $500 each month. An avid fan of Comfort DelGro & Citycab, I paid little heed to the fact that this insane amount could get me a nice little car in tow.

To me, it didn't make sense to teeter 20-25 minutes at the bus stop for a 10-minute ride. (Hello, SBS? It is faster for me to get to Bugis by train than to arrive at Bedok Interchange by bus. Preposterous!) Trains were a breeze till being propped under towering armpits became a given and noses came into contact one another. As petite as I may be, I am a solid. As we've learnt in Science, thou shalt not be compressed!

Thanks to the exponential increase, my utopian mode of transport is now far from the ideal.

Flagrant disregard for the initial hike meant I had to learn it the hard way. Agape was I when the meter read $16.80 instead of $9.80. (Aside from the fixed surcharge, how one derived the figure 35% to begin with baffles me.)

It doesn't take a genius to realise that at this rate, I could well be paying for a second-hand BMW in time to come.

So, I've been trying (old habits die hard) to resort to public transport and resisting the urge for my arm to do its gravity-defying lift.

My word, as I type this, I do realise that I am running late.

No matter. There's always the cab.

Oops! =X

A Letter for You.

Dear ____________ ,

I want to experience Happiness without You.

All this while, I have been wasting my time, waiting for the Answer. Not contented with nuances, I'd wanted a cemented assurance from You.

Days, months, years - I'd waited for you to drop a word. Stubbornly silent, nary a word parted our lips.

They said You did. Some even asked if You did. I found many excuses, albeit weak ones, to refute those statements.

I'd waited years for You. Surely I wasn't going to give up without a fight?

And fought I did.

It was a battle of loneliness and repression with the internal struggles, the guilt, the what-ifs, the transient bliss preceding an avalanche of wrought emotions and the blatant irony clanging in my face.

Even when I couldn't, I tried. For You.
But when You couldn't, You didn't.

Who was there for You in your abyss? Who was the one who'd spent hours encouraging you to believe in yourself? Who was the one who never put you down? At the end of the day, Mich's sums don't tally as her efforts had been for nought.

You don't need me anymore. And so, doors have been closed.

" I didn't mean to meet you then
We were just kids

I didn't mean for things to go as far as it did
I didn't mean to get so close and share what we did
I didn't mean to fall in love but I did
And you didn't mean to love me back but I know you did "

Let me move on.

I want to move on.

But You're holding me back. How can I close the chapter if there wasn't a start to begin with? Tangibles are what I need for closure, not notions and such.

Be honest with me. With Yourself.

Did You or didn't You?

That's all I want need to know.

Was it ever a Yes or a constant No?
Tell me so that I can let go.

Will You?

Yours Sincerely, Mich

Mich's Christmas Eve

24 December 2007
Cugini Restaurant & Lounge Bar

[ rated 9.5/10 at Singapore's most comprehensive food guide www.hungrygowhere.com as of 24 Dec 2007 ]

Mich was famished for some reason and had two set dinners in a night! *burp*Cugini's - It served very good Italian fare! At Cugini's : Mich's $100 set dinner.
Mich & Her Man.
The mandatory Christmas tree.
Mich, The Man, Angelina & Vincent
We tottered out to the alfreso area of Robertson Walk & there, Mich had her second set meal of the night.
What's Christmas without some revelling? =p

A shot of the revelling remnants before we headed home. As Mich crawled to bed at 5am, she couldn't help but notice the pretty moon that hung in solitude.